why do serial cheaters want to stay marriedwhy do serial cheaters want to stay married

He even told me, that I had now made it harder for him, because I chose to fight. His AP sounds unstable and emotionally abusive. But, his adrenaline seeking behavior usually extends to his love life and he finds the challenge of conquering new women intoxicating. Well everyone, just over two years ago, I probably though we would never have made it to this day, that was when the ea had started. The cheater can't or won't disclose why they cheated. The guy was not married either. We always love hearing from you and appreciate your support! Consider his actions since youve found out about the affair. Your husband should go to hr and find out what rules of engagement exist in his workplace. Sure they can overcome it but it will take a lot of personal fortitude and work and even then they still know they can do it AND get away with it for a while. One point for the good guys! What hes learned is most time people have their own agendas and sometimes they are measuring him up on how big a dupe hes going to be. He said his wife SUSPECTED hed had an affair and he said she did something really clever. Yet I dont think we will be celebrating until the weekend because my h isnt home until the weekend. Total ignoring is needed, no socialing of any kind. She explained that this question, though a valid and rational reaction, is certainly a hard one to answer. We are older with grown children, I know if I was younger he would be gone!! Right, Strength, but its a tricky situation cause they dont WANT to BE single, they just want to ACT single. But not only are a cheater's secrets. I mean is there ever a story about affair partners saying oh yeah my wife is lovely, shes beautiful, successful, a wonderful lover, great mother, I just like screwing other people on the side and lying to her. They have to believe her sob story and she has to believe his. When you reach out, you get no reply or told they'll get right back to you which they don't," Wish explained. Because you havent taken strong steps: Some people are just cheating because their partner hasnt taken any strong steps against them. First I would start with a conversation with my husband. Grab Now! I think we both have learned from this, it was difficult, still is, but I am hoping he has learned more from what he almost lost because of the ea, so it never happens again. My husband also worked with his affair partner for several years and initially ignored the occasional over the line comments. They found that what they term as sexual personality is the most likely factor to increase the likelihood that people will cheat. Thank you, Trying. Yep he was stupid enough to invite the camel into the tent. Wish I could invite you all over for a Chablis or two. Unfortunately he began to enjoy them after his father died and business was nearly failing. There are subtle, insidious ways in which a married man who cheats on a regular basis can seduce a smart woman. I would not take this lightly. I felt trapped, unheard, controlled and was unable to leave. Victims of cheating narcissists tirelessly look for concrete proof, but you could try for years without catching a slip-up. Serial cheaters like your husband and my ex like cake. I do not want to confront her because I think that could endanger my husbands job if she went to HR and she is the type who goes to HR and launches lawsuits on a whim. After a while, you literally dont feel bad about it. These sickos often have more than an affair in mind. Youre hurt and you arent going to heal overnight. I hope your husband has gotten clued in. I learned much later that he took that to mean that I accepted the blame for the whole affair.! but I dont feel an interest in establishing a close relationship like we might have had before. They dont care and more so they dont need an excuse. This man was very nice. Stupid skank, she may have thought she got what she wanted when they were overseas together, and the poor little wife didnt have a clue, but she had reality slap her in the face, on his arrival home. Or maybe he never had an affair. If you would answer those questions it would be so helpful. This research shows that demographic variables may not influence decision-making as much as previously thought that personality matters more, especially for men. You have come such a. He would be out the door. If he has decided to use other women as a source of reassurance and specifically if he feels reassured by the affairs that he has, he will have a difficult time letting that source go. By the time he was ripe for the picking, she knew all she needed to do was get him by himself, where I would not be any where near him, and that was getting him to pay for her ticket to see her family, he feel for it, paid for her ticket, unknown to me, and that was it. I said and by the way, she did the wrong thing, putting her exh on speaker phone, because she only did that, so out of all the conversations you hear of them talking, she puts the one on that has him get angry on. And I told him I felt the same way about him. Sylvia Smith loves to share insights on how couples can revitalize their love lives in and out of the bedroom. Address the person with your doubts (or proof) and let them know that you are aware of their 'fun' time. This really is a terrible story and I am so sorry you have had to go through it. (Or that is how my husband describes it). I just have NO tolerance for those that continue to run roughshod through their own lives, wreaking havoc on others with no impunity is when I get all judgmental. I gave her a good fight, I wasnt about to hand my life, my husband and my children to her on a silver platter, she didnt deserve any of it. Infidelity affects a woman 7. This is what happened to my single friend who got pulled into a relationship with a pig who would not commit to anyone and who collected as many women as possible. In this case, most men fear that their wives will divorce them whenever the true identification of them reveals. All too often, respect is the one crucial thing that is constantly . It was a beautiful time, but you know that was as tainted as they come, of a wedding anniversary. You tend to believe that if they dont answer their phone or if they are coming home late, they must certainly be with this other person. Im not trying to disturb you or upset you in any way . Hah. Even if he does feel like theres something missing in his marriage, the love may still be there. I believe he is now more open to not trusting anyone anymore. If youre considering staying with an unfaithful husband, make sure to consider whether you can get past the hurt. Why do cheating husbands stay married? I know sometimes when I write about the ow in my life, I get so frustrated and upset, after a while. This is just too much to deal with alone. I let people drift in and out of my life and dont really miss them when they re gone. Then he sets a boundary and she emails me againand on and on. They might justify their. Truthfully sadly I STILL dont see him in a bad light . He has not worked with her for 3 weeks. They may also enjoy the ego boost, or the thrill of sneaking around. But if you've caught your partner once and you're wondering if they're going to do it again, these habits can help you figure out which category of cheater they fall under. It is clear that your affair partner was a very troubled narcissist and that he was just looking for easy pickings in terms of the next victim. Narcissism: This person displays pathological selfishness, an extreme sense of entitlement, and he is always looking for new sources (people) to feed his ego. Im addicted to it but it kind of keeps so much that I want to let go, front-of-mind, and sometimes I question if Im hindering or helping my recovery! She is NOT married to the guy. I think all this talking is shaking me up so I may just observe for a while. They quickly grow bored. Then, take a hard look at whether his effort towards change seems genuine. Dont care that these men are married, dont care they turn the attention away. Even so, he keeps on cheating again and again because of two reasons - they can't live without it and they know they can get away with it. He feels bad that he did this to her even if he keeps on doing it. But thats another story ! Anyway. This usually translates into a global disloyalty to everyone in his life. Ever hear of hyper bonding? I am not shy but he made me blush and nervous and heaped a lot of praise and attention on me. Food may not interest you in the least, or you may dive into the junk food, especially sweets, which will give you an endorphin, feel-good rush (before making you crash and feel even more horrible). In turn, you might feel bad for "prying" and won't ask again. Serial cheaters will give you just enough information to make you feel like you know them, but you might still be left guessing. Good luck! So being friendly and having people on her side would have helped, I think. He knew how to cast the line to see if shed bite and she bit, all he had to do was reel her in and brush up on his cunning so his wife could be fooled again. Please contact a marriage counselor to help you get the professional support required to sort out how you are going to remain in this situation and still have a fulfilling, happy life. lol . For her crap. It blows my mind. He was smiling and making small talk and invading my personal space. Q:Do you think you had different reasons for entering into it than your affair partner did? (A Relationship Epiphany), tells Bustle. Serial cheaters get and stay married because on some level they too want a companion to share their life with. Thanks again for your honesty and your perspective. Ohhh and then she would go psycho, because of course he wouldnt turn his phone off for her, I must have done something to him. One time cheaters, on the other hand, will be more introspective and regretful. Cheating Girlfriend? Another one of the most common reasons cheating husbands stay married is fear of what they might be losing. They may feel unsatisfied in some way. But, anytime I have dropped into work to leave homemade cookies and cakes for the staff, I do not get a lonely for another couple vibe from her at all. Well a nasty little interior decorator who worked for me told me john was a crack head!!! So VERY disappointed in this posting. Just a whole heap of mind games. I returned to work after having and raising kids and felt overweight and out of the game. Serial cheating is nearly always the result of men marrying for reasons other than love Citizenship, for example.Add into that equation children that guilt the father into staying, despite the fact that the marriage is, and always has been loveless.

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why do serial cheaters want to stay married

why do serial cheaters want to stay married